How to protect yourself from online romance scams in South Africa

Financial scams are evolving rapidly, and some of the most deceptive ones no longer begin with cold calls or phishing emails, but with what seems like a genuine and personal conversation, says financial services provider FNB.

The bank warns that romantic financial scams, often disguised as sincere relationships, are defrauding people of millions.

“In a growing trend locally, reminiscent of what viewers saw in the Netflix documentary The Tinder Swindler, scammers use charm, digital intimacy, and emotional manipulation to swindle unsuspecting victims out of thousands of rands,” the group says.

FNB integrated advice product head Ester Ochse warns that these scams are on the rise, particularly targeting individuals who are active on dating platforms or those who engage regularly on social media.

“Romance scams are not just about emotional manipulation; they’re calculated financial heists. Using strategies such as social engineering, scammers build trust over weeks or months, only to strike when you least expect it, often under the guise of a crisis or business opportunity,” Ochse says.

Some warning signs include overly polished profiles, sudden emotional connections, and promises of luxury; urgent requests for money due to emergencies or opportunities, often coupled with pleas not to tell anyone; excuses to avoid meeting in person by claiming to be overseas or in remote areas; and small financial requests that escalate to larger sums, the group says.

"These scams don’t just empty out your bank account; they can derail your long-term financial goals or implicate you in other fraudulent activities. And during a time when many South Africans are trying to build financial resilience, every cent counts," says Ochse.

As more people look for connections online, romance scams are becoming more common. In 2022, victims in South Africa lost over R125 million, according to the Council for Scientific and Industrial Research (CSIR), the group says.

In 2024, the South African Police Service reported an 18% increase in commercial crimes, with romance scams playing a leading role.

Ochse urges consumers to treat new digital relationships like they would treat their online banking password or PIN, never share it with anyone. 

FNB head of fraud for retail, Ettienne Fourie, says: “We strongly encourage people to always remain vigilant and cautious to mitigate the chance of these fraudulent incidents materialising. Customers need to be aware that fraudsters are constantly coming up with new ways to deceive you to ultimately defraud you, including the use of romantic relationships. If something seems too good to be true, it usually is.”

“Love is not a financial plan. If someone you’ve never met in person asks for money, step back and ask yourself why. In many cases, the person on the other side of the screen is playing the long game. Don’t be swindled, your heart might recover, but your finances may not,” says Ochse.

FNB encourages customers to use any available banking channels to report suspicious activity or unauthorised transactions immediately.

PERSONAL FINANCE