Don’t fall for a digital ‘rom-con’

Published Feb 9, 2023

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Johannesburg - February is the month of love and it’s important that online daters know how to protect themselves in the digital dating space.

Online dating sites can be a wonderful place to meet new people and find a romantic partner, but as the popular Netflix documentary Tinder Swindler has shown, it’s easy to fall in love and fall victim to dating scams involving romantic con artists.

The chief executive of ESET Southern Africa, Carey van Vlaanderen, said knowing how to stop red flags can be the difference between being in love and knee-deep in debt.

According to the Federal Trade Commission in the US, reported losses to romance scammers were up nearly 80% compared to the previous year.

This was after an alert issued by the FBI which noted victims of romance fraud lost $1 billion ((R17.5bn) in 2021 alone.

According to the South African Banking Risk Information Centre (Sabric), some terror groups have been targeting South Africans to finance their criminal acts through romance scams.

Sabric also reported that online dating scams are used by fraudsters to launder the illicit proceeds of crime.

In 2021, eight suspects were arrested in Cape Town in connection with an online dating scam and stealing more than R100 million from victims in various countries.

Van Vlaanderen urged people to not fall for the “rom-con”.

“Online dating or romance scams are financially and emotionally costly as fraudsters exploit people’s vulnerabilities, trust, and feelings of loneliness,” she said.

“When visiting online dating platforms, be aware of photos that look too good to be true. An image search on Google can help you determine if the photo is authentic or a stolen or stock photo.”

She added that other red flags include requests for private information such as your ID number, declarations of love alarmingly early in the relationship, or a request for money to help them out of a situation.

Van Vlaanderen said that while dating scams have multiple layers of deception, they all rely on gaining a victim’s information. This should give everyone pause to think about how the management of personal information can allow criminals to build a detailed profile of their target.

“A common modus operandi is scammers using emotional manipulation to get a victim to send money, gifts, or personal information. Another common, and extremely traumatising, form of deception is sextortion.

“This begins as a seemingly normal relationship before the scammer pressures the victim into sending intimate photos or videos which are used as material to blackmail the victim,” she said.

Catfishing is another common trick scammers use which lures the victim into a relationship based on the attacker’s fictitious online persona.

“Once the victim is on the hook, the scammer will send messages about being in financial trouble with promises to pay the money back later,” Van Vlaanderen said.

ESET Southern Africa has provided tips on how to protect your feelings and your finances:

  • Scammers rarely ask for money at the beginning of a transaction. Instead, they may express their concerns about money in casual conversation, or use financial issues as an excuse not to meet.
  • Carefully consider your decision to leave a verified dating app for private messages. Not only does this give scammers access to your mobile number. Dating apps also provide a mechanism to report scammers and risky behaviour.
  • Do not send money to anyone. No matter how compelling their story may be. Talk to people you know and trust to understand their perspective on the situation.
  • Never share information that could be at risk, such as photos or videos.
  • If you decide to meet someone you met online in person, make sure the meeting is safe and in a public place, and that trusted friends and family are aware of your arrangements.

The Star

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